It’s September so you know what that means? Fall is almost here! The air will turn crisper, the leaves are about to change to a glorious myriad of golds, reds, and amber, and the pumpkins are almost ready for Halloween. A new color pallet will be blooming outside, and for our taste pallet a slew of pumpkin flavored products everywhere!
Pinterest is already stock full of pumpkin recipes including pumpkin muffins, pumpkin rolls, pumpkin bagels, and pumpkin snickerdoodles…and you can wash them down with pumpkin coffee, pumpkin beer, or even a pumpkin spice latte made famous by Starbucks. And while most can’t wait for this glorious new season and the promise of pumpkin paradise, I’m simply not ready.
Because I freaking hate pumpkin.
Not the actual fruit of course (yes it’s a fruit – google it). I mean who doesn’t love decorating with fall gourds? It’s so much fun to carve those little suckers up, pull out their guts, and toast the pumpkin seeds. And the kids love to paint them! But eat them? No thanks. Not yet anyway.
I’m not sure if the latest pumpkin craze is a blogger trend or a conspiracy from the pumpkin farming cartel, but enough already! Everywhere you turn there’s freaking PUMPKIN! On storefront windows, in endcap displays at grocery stores, and all over our Facebook feeds. But guess what?
IT’S NOT EVEN FALL YET!
Nope, the official first day of fall is September 23rd, but people are still jamming pumpkin down our collective throats. You know who I want to punch in the throat? PUMPKINS. (If they only had one.) Why oh why do I need pumpkin recipes now? I’m not making a pumpkin pie for my kids after school! Hell, they won’t even eat pumpkin flavored anything! Trust me I’ve tried.
I get it, you’re ready for a new season. Tired of the heat, grilling, and corn on the cob. You want to try something different, a foray into a cooler time of year. But we can do it with other recipes, can’t we? I mean I’ve seen some yummy apple crisp recipes floating around. Or how about a sweet potato casserole or butternut squash soup? I mean they’re orange inside and still signify fall, right?
I just don’t understand the fascination with the spicy pumpkin flavor. Don’t get me wrong, I used to like it…love it even. I made pumpkin muffins each year and raced to Starbucks to get my beloved Pumpkin Spiced Latte. (Before the Food Babe told me it was full of deadly chemicals.) But like Kim Kardashian – pumpkin has become overexposed.
It’s like when you first taste cookie butter and you exhale orgasmically and have to have another spoonful. Then you eat a little more and you still like it, but not as much. And by the time you polish off the entire jar, you’re so tired of it you just want to vomit. (My husband calls it the law of diminishing returns – whatever that means). Well, that’s how I feel about pumpkin.
So while the rest of you are toasting fall prematurely with your Pumpkin ale, or pinning your premature pumpkin recipes…I’ll still be here brooding. Boycotting the fleshy fruit and avoiding the pumpkin popularity like the plague. Instead, I’ll search for the next big fall flavor…like Brussel sprouts. Or rutabagas anyone? Oooh, how about Persimmons…that sounds sexy!
Who am I kidding? Pass the pumpkin bread.
Janine Huldie says
Loved that last line and as much I do love pumpkin, I am so not ready for Fall yet and still hoping summer food/drinks are allowed to be enjoyed for a few more weeks here, too.
Live from the Playroom says
Hahaha! This is hilarious, but I’m the exact opposite side of the issue! Bring me pumpkin all year long. We literally eat pumpkin pie in July. Speaking of – I should get that in the menu for tonight! 😉
You are hysterical! Please school me on WHY I should love it?!
Rachael Boley says
This is hilarious! As much as I love fall, I get this. It’s a lot of pumpkin! I think for me it’s not so much the pumpkin everything I love as what it represents… I’m a fall lover through and through but I’ll be honest, I could live without SO much pumpkin 😉
You know I’m a pumpkin girl…all year long. So, seeing pumpkin all over Pinterest and marketable signs everywhere doesn’t make me sad. Plus, being from MN, I’m used to wearing high boots and sweaters after school starts, so I’m ok with the changing of seasons.
Allie Smith says
I’m not ready for fall. And I don’t like the taste of pumpkin anything. But I do love the smell of pumpkin. Weird? Yes!
Herchel S says
I love the pumpkin spice latte just about as much as I love the food babe which isn’t very much at all … But I love pumpkin. I make pumpkin pies year around. You are definitely correct about the over-saturation of pumpkin everything on our newsfeeds, though. Just because I like to eat it doesn’t mean that I need to see it on every social media platform 24/7.
Aubrey @ 53 Weeks says
HATE is such a strong word! But yeah, seeing all the fall stuff out and forcing me to think about Halloween and costumes already…grr!! I’ll take pumpkin bread anytime though..just saying!!
My friend went on an absolute rant yesterday about pumpkin flavored. She was saying to call it pumpkin pie spice flavored because pumpkins themselves just taste like bland squash! Ha! She went on a rant.
I do like pumpkin, but not everything. I like the actual fruit itself – we put it into a stew – and I love the roasted seeds, and I do love pumpkin pie spice in coffee or muffins or breads.
But not everything.
i hate pumpkin stuff too… can’t STAND pumpkin pie… that’s like my hell. but i love decorating with them… however not before the END of september. i love in ARIZONA!
Nicole Johnson says
I could just as easily have apple cider. Though I enjoy pumpkin it is starting to get a bit overexposed. Oh and can you write a post on why they had Halloween candy out in August that seems wrong and gross.
I love pumpkin and pumpkin stuff, but I hate when it shows up too early!
Hahahaha booooo!! Punkin is the BEST man! You know what you need……some heirloom punkin lovin from your friend Jen. I betcha I could find SOMETHING made out of my real, orange orbs of goodness that would make you change your mind!
I’m with you though on the early stuff. I wrote a post once called “Dear Pinterest, it’s not Fall Yet.” I’m like that with all the holidays though. Christmas should not come before Thanksgiving and Thanksgiving should not come before Halloween. I like my holidays to be celebrated, don’t get me wrong, but c’mon. I shouldn’t see Santa the first week in November.
I need to read that post! And I WILL eat pumpkin eventually…in November around Thanksgiving!
Elizabeth (Rock-A-Bye Parents) says
That’s it, we can’t be friends anymore! LOL I was just thinking recently about how much pumpkin stuff is around now days, but I really love me some pumpkin! I can’t say I’m ready for fall yet, it doesn’t feel like fall up here either, but the cider mills are open, so the taste of fall is out in full force. Now if I could just have them with hot weather for the entire time I’d be a happy camper!
I would LOVE cider mills! And if I lived up north I’m sure I’d be crushing on all things fall!
This post is great! I love pumpkin in the fall, but with temperatures still near 90 degrees, it just doesn’t quite feel right. I’ve also noticed a lot of posts about Halloween activities, recipes & decor. I’m frankly not ready for that. At all. I’m still in denial that school started!
Me too! I want more summer!
Tove Maren says
I get it and I am right here with you! We don’t have pumpkins in Denmark – so I actually don’t care for them – except in pie… Anything is delicious in a pie format!
I agree, topped with whip cream, DELISH!!
Hahaha, I am almost positive that we had this same conversation last year 😉 I do hate that we have barely put our toes into September and we have more pumpkins than ever!
The other day a girlfriend called in TEARS!!!! Hobby Lobby had Christmas Decorations out!!!!! She couldn’t take it and neither can I….
I love to decorate for fall, but lets savor the moment when it comes… October 1st!!!!! = Halloween
Some time in November I switch to Thanksgiving…. Then the end of Thanksgiving weekend we get all Christmasy…..
That is how we roll…
Oh and I gave up the PSL last year because of all of the chemicals….. I get a regular latte and add my own spice at home 😉
I get you 100% on this one girly!!!
M. Reagan says
Hahahahah! My friends and I have the same conversation every year. Love your reference to the pumpkin farming cartel. I may have to use that in this year’s verbal pumpkin rant 5.0!
I love it! It’s so true. It’s like pumpkins already? Really? But then you give in and suddenly your having pumpkin muffins with pumpkin spice coffee. The only thing missing is an ascot.
LD Sr says
Fcuk pumpkins! I used to like pumpkin seeds, until they starting messing with my bowels and my urine. Pumpkins 🎃 and a huge no-go for me 🚫. I feel like pumpkin pie wanna be sweet potato pie SO DAMN BAD! lol but it can’t compare. That’s why mostly everyone eats it with whipped cream, because it’s super bland, and it has to be spiced to be tolerable. Now sweet potato pie or bread…. pass me that all year!